My Jandek Plague Journal: 3/28/20 "What Should I Do?"

"I found out/something different/So what should I do?" There's an impotence that comes with being safe from harm. I'm watching my country fall apart, have been my entire life whether it be Reagan laughing as AIDS ran rampant, Clinton ordering troops to attack protesters in Seattle, Bush bringing imperial rule to domestic policy, or Obama rubber-stamping it all and jailing only those who revealed those secrets. The sin is not what we've done, but being made aware of who we are. And now the current administration. The day before my last summer as an adjunct I went through every floor of my building on campus taking down Neo-Nazi propaganda. A year later, I quit higher ed and started the process of leaving the country. I left for economic reasons, but the proud display of overt fascism made leaving a priority. I no longer felt safe. Now watching fascism seize more and more control by leveraging the pandemic, I'm at a loss as to what to do. If all I could do while I was were there was flee, what can I do from outside? -3/28/20. "What Should I Do?" from White Box Requiem (lyrics) (one week later)